Sue NASA again, quick!

These scientists at NASA are really messing with our celestial alignment. First they lob a refrigerator at a comet, hitting it at something like 35,000 kilometers per hour (that's really, really fast!). The resulting Deep Impact has had the predictable effect of "ruining the natural balance of forces in the universe". Didn't they know this would happen? So naturally an agrieved Russian astrologer, Marina Bai, is suing NASA for $300M for violating her "life and holies". I know $300M would go a long way towards restoring my life and holies.

And now, what are they doing? Finding new planets? Once again they're messing with the universe. Throwing another monkey wrench in our prayer wheel. Will these insults never stop? I have an idea! NASA should let Bai name the new planet. She'll come up with something better than 2003UB₃₁₃.